Thursday, November 23, 2006


Some people live to find fault. They can read every line of the Bible and say it is of God, yet disagree with it, too. Some folks can disagree upon doctrine, but agree upon a portion of scripture, yet still view the other is wrong simply because the other person said it. I find this absolutely mind boggling.

I lived with arguments my entire childhood. Often I would go into my room and cover my head with my pillow. But that didn't work. I still heard it. Daddy would leave. But the argument didn't. Mama would go on and on and on and on about how awful daddy was, how horrible my biological mother was, (even though she never saw her or spoke to her). I came to realize that my stepmother wasn't happy unless she was finding fault with someone. She wasn't satisfied with answers unless answers agreed with her. And even then she'd find something wrong with the way folks agreed with her.

After she divorced my dad, I still kept in touch with her. Time after time I'd travel nine hours one-way to help her with something she said no one would help her with. Time after time I would discover upon arrival that many church folks and even some relatives had tried to help her, only to be rebuffed for not doing it her way. She had a few pet people in her life that could do no wrong. Their thoughts were pure, their words were sound and their motives beyond reproach. And even though those pet-people ordered her around like a dog and had absolutely nothing good to say about her, she defended them, praised them and worshipped them.

Recently I had an email from a blogger (I'll call him/her Gen) who asked me why I never commented on thoughts he/she had regarding a certain group of Christians (I'll call them AZ). Gen hasn't had good experiences with the AZ group. AZ's come across as know-it-all folks to Gen. Gen says he/she can't talk to AZ's. AZ's look at Gen and Gen's friends with low regard. AZ's see black as grey and white as ivory. Gen sees black as black and white as white.

After several emails I finally told Gen, I just didn't know what to say. I gave up trying to tell folks what color life was a long time ago. I'm simply colorblind to all the fabric of their arguments. It would have to be threadbare in the light of Jesus before anyone could explain some things to some people and then those people would argue with Jesus.

Folks are hard to live with when they have their minds made up about something. My dear departed stepmother called them bullheaded. Proverbs calls them something else. "The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who listens to counsel is wise. A fool's wrath is quickly known; but a prudent man ignores an insult." Pr.12:15-16. A bit further down it says, "There are those who speak rashly like the piercing of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."

I find that folks who constantly put down others and point out others' words as false, unnecessary, or without foundation are like the "one who troubles his own house. They will inherit the wind". Eventually no one will listen to them. Eventually they will be ignored. Eventually everyone will turn to the folks who will reason and listen and hear.

I've discovered something vitally important to those who enjoy blogging and reading blogs and responding to blogs. Sometimes you can step into some mudpuddles.

For newcomers, let me suggest something. If the bloghost has something you are interested in, read it. If you want to comment, comment. If you feel attacked, don't go back for more. Just stop reading them. That's what I do. And if your comments are rebuffed (even though you meant them with the most sincere intentions), forget about it and move on. For "anxiety in a man's heart weighs it down, but an encouraging word makes it glad." Pr. 12:25. There's enough negativity in the world without subjecting yourself to someone's when you don't have to. So if you find yourself in a quagmire of mud, fault no one but yourself.

Encourage someone today. Make someone's heart glad. If all you have to say is something negative, do the world a favor, keep it to yourself. Life is short. Time really does count. So make it count for something special for someone today. [copyrighted, 2006, selahV]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Excellent post Selah! Thank you for your wise words.